This Would Have Saved Me Time, Money, and Sleepless Nights
We wait until something goes wrong. That’s how most family caregivers end up at the ER at 2 a.m., with no paperwork, no plan, and no clue what Mom’s latest medication does.
I’ve been there. And if I could rewind, I’d do five things differently. These aren’t medical tips—they’re survival strategies. They would’ve spared me so much panic, guilt, and guesswork.
Here are 5 health-related things I wish I had known before things got urgent—and how you can get ahead now. (This is what I teach all our members)
1. Know Their Full Medication List (and Why They’re Taking Each One)
Seems obvious, right? But most caregivers only find out during a crisis. “Did your dad take blood thinners this morning?” the nurse asks. And you freeze.
Experts at Mayo Clinic recommend keeping an up-to-date medication list in both digital and printed form. Include:
- Name of medication
- Dosage
- Why it’s prescribed
- Side effects to watch for
I also added a column: “Doctor who prescribed it.” Because when new prescriptions come in, you’ll want to check for overlap—or dangerous interactions.
Pro tip: Bring this list to every appointment, not just the primary doctor.
2. Understand Their Diagnoses in Layman’s Terms
What does CHF actually mean? How does Stage 2 kidney disease affect appetite? What symptoms are red flags, and what’s just “normal aging”?
Doctors often assume we know more than we do. But Cleveland Clinic reminds us: You’re allowed to ask for plain-language explanations.
Request printouts. Ask for a nurse educator. Use trusted websites—not random forums—to fill the gaps.
My turning point? Learning that Mom’s confusion at night wasn’t dementia—it was a side effect of UTI. Knowing what to look for helped me intervene earlier.
3. Track Changes in Daily Function—Not Just Symptoms
Doctors want to know: “Have they had any falls?” But they really need to know:
- Are they eating less?
- Is their gait slower?
- Are they forgetting names they used to know?
This is where your observations matter more than labs.
The National Institute on Aging says functional decline is often the first sign of a worsening condition. Keeping a “function log” helped me advocate for more care hours before Mom had another stroke.
Try jotting notes weekly:
- Monday: Needed help cutting food
- Thursday: Confused stove knobs
This makes your parent’s invisible decline visible—to doctors, to siblings, and even to yourself.
4. Create an Emergency Health Binder
In a crisis, you don’t want to be digging through piles. You want:
- Insurance cards
- Medical history
- DNR or advance directives
- Doctor names + numbers
- Medication list (from above)
- Known allergies
The CaregiverHaven™️ recommends creating a grab-and-go binder with copies of all vital health information. Bonus: It helps if you ever have to hand things off to a sibling or paid aide.
5. Don’t Wait to Ask for Specialist Referrals
Primary care is just the beginning. If you notice mood shifts, mobility changes, chronic pain, or memory issues—ask for a referral. The earlier the intervention, the better the outcome.
Here’s who helped us:
- Neurologist for memory and coordination
- Geriatrician for overall aging care
- Physical therapist for muscle loss
- Dietitian for eating struggles
Don’t wait until they’re “bad enough.” As Johns Hopkins Medicine points out, preventative care leads to longer independence and fewer hospital stays.
What These 5 Things Changed for Our Class Graduates
I stopped reacting and started preparing.
Instead of:
- Scrambling to find paperwork
- Calling a sibling in a panic
- Guessing about meds
- Rushing to the ER
I:
- Had answers in my binder
- Understood the signs of escalation
- Had scripts for what to say at appointments
- Felt less alone, less scared, more ready
That kind of clarity? It’s everything.
What to Do This Week
You don’t have to do it all today. Start with one of the following:
Make a medication list and tape it inside a cabinet
Google “daily function log template” and print one
Put together the start of a health binder
Ask your parent’s doctor: “Is there a specialist we should be seeing?”
Small steps lead to massive peace of mind.
When You Feel Like It’s Too Much…
That’s not your fault. This system isn’t built for family caregivers. But we build our own systems. One list. One form. One appointment at a time.
Give yourself grace. You’re learning. You’re adapting. You’re showing up.
You’re doing more than anyone can see—and probably better than you think.
What If You’re Just Getting Started?
Then you’re ahead of the curve.
Start organizing now, even if your parent is still fairly independent. You’ll thank yourself later. This isn’t about paranoia—it’s about peace.
Because emergencies don’t schedule themselves. But we can be ready.
Ready for more calm and clarity? Join the waitlist for From Burnout to Balance—the support system that makes caregiving feel like a breeze. You'll be the first notified when the masterclass opens again—limited seating.
